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It happened like this...
| October 3rd, 2002 |
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| It all began... |
Tonight I headed up to Savannah, GA to investigate the origin of the newest member of lineupless, Josh Mason X. I knew right off that things weren't going to be easy. For one nobody was talking. Everyone was pretty uneasy since 'the incident' occurred. I knew if I was going to get answers, bribes would be in order. I figured the first place to go was to the original himself, Josh Mason. He looked reluctant and scared at first, but as soon as he saw the presents I had brought his face lit up like a little 12 year old.
| OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH....GIFTS!!!! |
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| "I'm so happy. About the gifts that is." |
He lightened up and started to talk to me, but I interrupted him, "You aren't Josh Mason X are you?" He replied, "No, of course I'm not." "But how can I know?" I queried. "Take a look at me. Take a good long look at me." I thought this over for a second and decided to comply with his request.
| October 4th, 2002 |
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| The long hard look began. |
I dug my heels and started to take a good long look at the so-called "Josh Mason". Covering every millimeter of his face with stares. Looking for clues, mistakes something that might reveal his true identity to me.
| October 7th, 2002 |
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| Okay it's him. |
Okay so it was him. You can't be too sure on these sorts of things. He told me of the night that Josh Mason X came into being. "I think back to that night like it was yesterday. Except of course, I spent all of yesterday sitting there while you stared at me. I remember that I had been drinking quite heavily that night and that I had engaged in some very radical S & M Body piercing."
| When Josh Mason Drinks... |
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| He tends to be the freak. Bout it bout it. |
He continued, "So during all of this piercing madness and drinking shenannigans, I felt a sharp pain in my leg. At first I thought it was just herion, but then as the night wore on, I realized I had been drugged. I felt my eyes grow heavy and my body sag to the ground. When I came to my DNA had been replicated and Josh Mason X had been created." I realized I wasn't going to get far with Josh, so I figured I'd better check out his roommates. I thought it would be best to start with Kelly, who really isn't his roommate, but was convenient for a picture. I started to interrogate her, but she told me to "talk to the feet" (kinda like talk to the hand, but more accommodating due to the fact that her arms had been blow off in a gang war).
| I have no hands. |
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| Talk to the feet. |
I realized two things right then and there. 1. I wasn't getting anything out of this girl. 2. No female is really smart enough to clone, so the most she could have really done is cheer on some guy. So I moved on to other roommates. Brad. Brad was a smooth talking, hamburger munching fellow who Josh Mason was madly in love with.
| I talk smooth. |
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| I munch hamburgers. |
It hit me that Josh could never love a man who would clone his unconcious body. So I figured I would give up on those two love-birds and investigate the last of them, Pat. Pat had red eyes. I realized that he was in fact a Terminator.
| Pat. |
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| A Terminator. |
So we sat down and talked about the upcoming war and all. We laid out arguements for both sides and when we had reached a mutual stalemate (and he had to go kill some "resistance" leader) we called it a night. I figured I'd better double check something.
| Hmmmmmmmmmm. |
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| Nope. It's definately not the clone. |
Double checking never hurt anyone. I was frustrated with my inability to find any clues or facts leading me to Josh Mason X, but rather than vent, I slipped off into a deep sleep.
| October 8th, 2002 |
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| I Drift Off to Slumberland |
I slept for what was either half an hour or nine days. When I awoke however, groggy and disoriented I was met by a terribly shocking discovery. Josh Mason X was here in Savannah, right in front of me.
| October 17th, 2002 |
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| Josh Mason X IS HERE! |
I could tell by the sharp knife and the stabbing motion that he was in a hostile mood. All my clothes had been taken! My mouth was unable to move and my defense hammer was rendered useless. I fainted immediately. When I came to, Josh Mason X was gone. Realizing that I was in over my head, I quickly put on new clothes and headed for home. Closing the investigation for good.
| I awoke in a dream like state |
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| unaware of the events that took place. |
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